Most people around the world look at the new year with hope of accomplishing something new, something more, something greater.
It is our innate human tendency to grow and expand our sense of self - be it through expansion in our influence at our workplace or in our personal relationships, most of us feel this pull. And yet, it is equally true that many of us give up on our resolutions within a few days or weeks into the New Year.
To understand how we can make our resolution work, we must understand why we make the resolution in the first place? As you might have heard, we are not human beings on a divine journey but we are divine beings on a human journey. In other words, each one of us is a manifestation of the infinite universal intelligence. As even science tells us we are all made up of star stuff. In this manifestation as a human, we are on a constant search for unity with our true nature which is vast like the universe. It is this inner force for unity with our true Self, that compels us towards being more, being larger, and being the best version of ourselves that we can be.
So then what is it that holds us back from realizing our Goals? All those forces that work in the opposite direction like reins pulling back a race-horse from going faster. These reins can take the form of Self-limiting beliefs and opposing desires. Let's say I want to get fit this year and I decide to go for a 30 minute jog every morning from 1st of Jan 2023. Then the moment I get thoughts in my mind such as: "Oh, I have never jogged in the last 10 years so how can I do it now?", or "It's better for my body to get some more rest in the cold winter morning…don't they say 8 hours of sleep is a must!" - all the reins holding me back are in action! What we don't realize is that the ropes are not real - they are only in our minds.
To further illustrate the idea of self-limiting beliefs, think about how the caretakers of elephants keep the baby elephant chained to a pillar. It gets so used to not being able to break the chain as a baby, that when it grows up even though it is much stronger and has the ability, it never tries to break free. Our self-limiting beliefs are like the chains tying the elephant. We are much stronger but we never try to break free of them.
Back to our New Year Goals, we can replace fitness with any other goal that we believe is rooted in expanding our idea of self. Once we recognize this pattern of need for expansion and the opposing forces of self-limiting beliefs and opposing desires, we just need to go within and ask ourselves the crucial question: How deeply do we want this Goal to come true? Staying with the Goal in quiet inner contemplation will show us the truth. If it is a surface level goal (like a whim), it will be easily obstructed by any of the opposing forces. If, however, it is rooted deep within and connected to our idea of the self, then it has the energy and strength to break any barriers.
To summarize, our tendency to create New Year goals (or any other Self-focused Goals) are tied to our innate nature to expand our sense of Self. Self-limiting beliefs and opposing desires are like ropes that can prevent us from achieving our goals. Discovering such goals that are deeply connected to our sense of Self gives us the energy and strength to break any barriers to realizing them.
Photos by Jenna Lee on Unsplash, Stephan Streuders at pexels.com, & Austin Schmid on Unsplash
The author, Anuj Chadha, is a Life & Executive Coach, Founder of Three Circles. At Three Circles, we come with a deep understanding of what it takes to navigate the challenges that life throws at us. We partner with our clients, listen to their life aspirations, and support them to break through the obstacles that seem to be holding them back. Life is too precious to be unhappy, unsure, or unfulfilled. Give us the opportunity to partner with you as you re-imagine and re-create the Life that you Love!
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